Wednesday, March 29, 2006

The Job #2


So I have been absent from the online community due to a life change. I have entered the world of nine to five once again. Do to the added expense and Jen's job change I needed to get a second job. I was hoping for a big raise, but that didn't happen!
Anyway I have some really cool guys form church that set me up with the greatest frozen pizza company on the planet. So now twice a week I break away from the warm and fuzzy world of church ministry and enter the frozen winter of pre-made pizza bliss.

The best part (other than standing in the 40 degree room) is that I get to work with a few of those cool guys I told you about. So as of this week I have added a new item to my life to-do list. It reads simply: TRY TO TAKE OVER THE WORLD!!!! ....and under that it details my plan. I will explain it in brief.

First I learn to make the greatest pizza ever.
Second I get everyone addicted to the greatest pizza ever.
Third I threaten to with hold the greatest pizza ever if I am not elected second highest ruler of the galaxy.

Why second you ask. Well because I am not try to unseat God. The last time that happened Satan got his butt kicked out of heaven and the whole world went to sin. I for one would like us all to learn a lesson from this.
STOP PLAYING GOD! You are not good at it and the position is taken!!!

In all honesty my plan is not original. I am simply following the example of the great Col. Sanders who laced his chicken with an addictive chemical that caused people to crave it fort-nightly. Thank heavens he was stopped, but the combined efforts of American and British intelligence agents. Just think if the Col. had not tried to cross the Atlantic ocean and drawn the attention of MI6.

I will not suffer this set back! I know that I will receive support from the media, who will see me as an oppressed free thinker that the government is trying to keep down. By the time they figure out what I am really it will be to late. They too will have fallen under pizza control. Actually who am I kidding? I media will never figure out what I am doing even though I just told them.

3 comments:

scott said...

Take over the World!......BRILLIANT!

Acey M. said...

xD! P.B., this is hilarious. BTW, this is Amanda M. from DV8. And, what's the pizza company? I'm really curious, because, honestly, all those pictures of pizzas made me hungry. At 9:19 PM.

...And, I realized that I ended up "stealing" Jenn's bobbie pins by going home with the hair-do...Yeah, that was random. Sorry.

See ya on Sunday, P.B.!

jblaha said...

Sweet! Plus I could be your bodyguard too. Or, like, Secret Service captain or...whatever.

jblaha